Hey, this is a fair question, and you seem sincere in at least wanting to explore some options. I am a Professional Life Coach, and an adult learning developer and instructor. Here are some ideas, try one or two out and evaluate how they work for you. Continue mixing and matching strategies until you get the result you are looking for.
* Consider all the people who you are concerned about annoying. Prioritize them based on their importance to you and what is at stake for maintaining that relationship. This helps identify who you should start your efforts with.
* Get feedback! Even if you think you know what it is that you are doing that is annoying, narrow it down by person. Find out from each individual, in their own words what specifcally it is you are doing - at this point you are not defending yourself, but instead, just taking in the feedback, encouraging their honest feedback; once they have shared that, make sure you also have them tell you what you could do differently that would relieve the situation. This is a critical step, because you want to hold them accountable to a solution they came up with on their own. Finally, if it seems realistic to you, commit to a change right there, if you do not agree, say you need to think about how you will take their feedback and make some changes - and you will let them know when you have a firm answer. Don't forget to thank the person for giving you feedback :-)
* Analyze your data. Take a look at what feedback you got, are there trends or themes? Challenge yourself to think about what is going on inside you when you exhibit these behaviors. Are you in a certain mood or feeling a certain way? Start becoming aware of what is triggering these behaviors so you can see them coming and mitigate any negative reactions, ie. being more annoying ;-)
* Considering each person is different and will have different suggestions for you to relating with them better, it may be helpful to identify on paper what you will do differently with the important people in your life.
* Track your efforts. As you start implementing new habits, track how its going so you can see what works, what doesn't, and when.
* Finally, keep getting feedback. And make sure you ask for not just what you do "wrong", but what you also do "right" :-)
First, listen more than talk. Second, think about the other person more than yourself. Third, if you know you are annoying people you probably know what you are doing that is annoying them. Don't do it. I would start at the beginning though becaue it concentrates on the root of the issue. People tend to be annoyed by things you say. If you don't say as much there will be less to be annoyed about and you might learn from listening what they would rather hear. The same goes for the second. If you think about what the other person wants or likes instead of the other way around then it is easier to consider their feelings, or likes, or dislikes. Again the third is obvious. Don't do things you know annoy other people if you don't want to annoy them. Without more specific information about what you are doing to annoy people, that is the best I can give.
If you want to stop being annoying then learn what it is that makes you that way. What is it about yourself that you believe annoys others. When you determine that, stop that particular behavior but you must find something to replace it or you'll end up doing the same thing again. The bottom line is, you must do a self-assessment and change those habits that you don't like about yourself so that you can like yourself better thereby allowing others to like you as well because face it, no one likes an annoying person!
If you have an annoying personality you might start by checking your diet, you may have a chemical imbalance causing your behavior. If it is not that, try some counselling, maybe being annoying is a coping mechanism for something you are dealing with.
Most of the time you don't realize that you r annoying someone until and unless someone tells u.........cuz when u say u r annoying someone, he or she is not feeling comfortable with you.....I guess u should try 2 understand the person you r dealing with... you should listen 2 what others are saying and let them speak or do any action....so that when you two are conversing or doing anything else, you talk on an appropriate topic which the other person is interested in...n make him or her feel comfortable with you....speak in gentle voice with a smile, be confident, have a good body language, maintain good body postures......Moreover you must try to analyze yourself especially your personality....try 2 change your habits which you think can be annoying to others.....have the right attitude...just be yourself, chill out.....and I'm sure you will like yourself more than before!!...:-)
I suffer from this problem myself, although I am getting better. For me, shutting up, bathing regularly, wearing somewhat more fasionable clothes, looseing some small annoying habbits (constantly shakeing leg, picking at face, ect.) made a big difference. It can be very hard to change over though, because you need to learn social skills, and to do that you have to find a group of people who will put up with you while you are learning, which can be dificult.
You don't say what's annoying about you and who says it's annoying. Are you socially awkward? Do you fail to pick up on nonverbal social cues? That could be a symptom of autism, particularly Asperger's syndrome. Have you been tested by a psychologist? Doing so could provide some insight into your social challenges, and there may be workarounds that you can learn to help you over these kinds of hurdles, once you know more about the way your thinking works.
I would first sit down with myself and review all instances that people have said that I was being annoing and what exactly it was that I was doing. After careful consideration and self analysing what you did and why you did it can you then fix the problem because the problem is not simply that you are annoying but why are you that way. There has to be something going on within you that is creating this. Are you lonely? Starved for attention? Do you feel left out of conversations and feel as though you need to act or speak outrageously in order to get the attention you so badly crave? And with answering those types of questions for yourself then you can start the healing. For instance if you are starved for attention and don't feel that no one likes you then you should spend more time with yourself and find out what it is about you that you like so that you can present it to others so that they will like you too.
The first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem, so good job. Next, if you notice that what you are doing or saying is annoying then try to stop yourself from doing it and becoming even more annoying. I think its more of a think before you do thing. If you think what you are about to say is annoying then don't say it.
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